RE: Another fun survey :)

1.  WHO WERE YOU NAMED AFTER?

 Benjamin in the Bible, I think 

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

 I started to get a little choked up when watching "Epic Live" on Saturday night, I can't wait for Heaven! 

3. Do you like your handwriting

 Nope 

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?

  It varies 

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

 No 

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?

 I'd probably bug the snot out of me. 

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM ALOT?

 Never! 

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS

 No 

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?

 I might be talked into it 

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?

 It's been so long since I've had cereal that I don't know anymore. 

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?

 Yes 

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?

In some ways 

 13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?

 Mint Chocolate Chip 

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?

 Face 

15. RED OR PINK?

 Red 

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOU?

 I need to be in better shape 

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST

 Julie 

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?

 I always enjoy reading people's responses 

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?

 blue jeans and brown trail running shoes 

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?

 Dilly bar :) 

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?

 My coworkers talking 

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?

 Probably a beige color 

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?

 Walking into my grandparent's house when things have been cooking 

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?

 Some guy from Verizon who wanted me to upgrade my phone 

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?

 I like her, I like her a lot :) 

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?

 Combat kayaking :) 

27. HAIR COLOR?

Dark brown

28. EYE COLOR?

 dark brown 

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?

 No 

30. FAVORITE FOOD?

 It varies, big fan of lasagna, pizza, and steak 

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

 I like real life stories, they tend to vary 

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?

 U2-3D with Julie, and it was her idea :) 

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?

 dark blue with black 

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?

 Spring and fall 

35. HUGS OR KISSES?

 Yes please!  But I'm waiting to kiss until I'm married 

36. FAVORITE DESSERT?

 Chocolate chip cookies or ice cream 

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?

 Not sure 

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND

 Everyone 

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?

I've been working on "Digital Rebel XTi/400D Digital Field Guide"

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?

 at work it is the Gateway power button 

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?

 caught up on Lost 

42. FAVORITE SOUND?

 Julie's voice, being out in nature 

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?

 Cream and Jimi Hendrix 

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?

 Ojague, Guinea 

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?

I don't know that I have one particular talent, I know enough about stuff to be dangerous

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

 Not answering this one, it's a security question 

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?

 Whoever wants to respond 

Safe in an empty castle

Once there was a man who ruled over a small village in the mountains. He lived in the castle above the village where he could look down over his people. He loved his people and the people loved him. His castle was open and everyone on the country knew him to be an open and generous host. All was well and life was good. Then one day he had to make a difficult decision. This decision made the people of the town angry and the mob chased the man back into his castle. He bolted the doors and hid by himself in his castle. He hid there for years, afraid that the mob was going to come for him. The people of the town had soon forgotten the offense and went on with life. But their life was not as good, because this good man was still hiding in his castle. After many years of fear and misery, the man got tired of living safe in an empty castle. He decided to go down to the village and apologize. He was still afraid the people would hurt him, but he decided that being hurt by the people would be less painful than the fear and isolation he had suffered with for years. He stood in the town square and apologized to the people. The people quickly forgave him and restored him. The castle was reopened and all were welcome again. The man was happy and the people were happy, life was good again.

I think sometimes one of the hardest things for any of us is to allow ourselves to be loved and to be forgiven. We feel like we screwed up and people are angry and we run away. Sometimes there is pain and anger, but among people who really love each other such wrongs can be quickly forgiven and let go of. Many times we refuse to accept that love and forgiveness, we isolate ourselves to protect ourselves and find out that we may be "safe" but were are alone. Love is a risky business, if we are going to have a life full of love and people we are going to have to risk, no only that someone would hurt us but that we would hurt someone else. Jesus told us to love others as we love ourselves, but sometimes the converse is the hardest. We have to love ourselves, and be loved, as we love others. If someone wrongs me I can usually forgive and move on easily. But if I hurt someone else I often beat myself up. It can be easier to love other people because then we're "right" and "good" and "better", it helps our pride. But to allow others to love us, especially when we have wronged someone, puts us in a place of humility, vulnerability, and weakness. But that is the place we must be in order to walk with Jesus. To know the Grace of God we have to know that we need that Grace. Jesus preferred time with the "sinners" over the "righteous" because the "sinners" knew they needed Grace, they were humble and open to receiving God's love.

Sometimes I have to be reminded that I have to come out of my castle, to remember that people love me and care for me, even when I have wronged them. Being humble and vulnerable with people is much better than being "safe" by myself.